Thursday, August 25, 2005

Top 11 Reasons Hugh Hewitt Was Not Invited To My Bachelor Party

11. Michael Savage said he wouldn't show if Hugh was there

10. Afraid he'd no show and send Carol Platt Liebau and Tim Taylor in his place

09. He callously disregarded the invitation to Atomizer's wedding so he's off the "A-list" of invitees to anything bigger than a corn feed

08. His ratings came out on Friday and he was disconsolate

07. Strippers make him "Uncomfortable"

06. He was busy that night attending James Lileks' "How To Be A Modern Caring Man (and still get laid)" Symposium

05. JB refused to give him the title "Gymnasiarch of the Bachelor Party"

04. We already had five hate-filled white guys shooting their mouths off

03. Speaking fee? For Hugh Hewitt?

02. Karl Rove has stipulated that Hugh and Atomizer never travel together. If anything were to happen, the conservative movement would be crippled

01. No protestants allowed

1 Comments:

Blogger Kim said...

This is the funniest thing I have read in years....oh...my...god, I nearly spit diet Pepsi all over the screen at the Carol Platt Lebou comment. But I must disagree: Hugh is intellectual, not dorky, and women find that sexy. But then I have an entry in the "Blog of the Week" thingy so I think "Ralphie" is the greatest thing since sliced bread....love you, Hugh! (And just for the record....Lileks IS the MAN...he's cute, he's smart, he cooks, he cleans...now if we can just make a Bee Gees fan out of him, he'd be perfect.)

3:59 AM  

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