Which Founding Father Would Make The Best Vikings Coach?

I’m sure Brad Childress will do a fine job as the new head coach of the Minnesota Vikings. I even pledge to hold back on criticizing him until at least halftime of the first pre-season game (except of course, I reserve the right to criticize any and all draft day decisions). But while contemplating the qualities I would like to see in our new coach, I couldn’t help but lament that we will never know what one our founding fathers could have done leading the Vikings.

You might think that an 18^th century statesmen, no matter how brilliant, wouldn’t be able to relate to modern professional athletes, but nothing could be further from the truth. James Madison, for example would have been a perfect fit. Consider this excerpt from Paul Johnson’s “A History of the American People” (p. 258)

“When as Secretary of State, he [James Madison] had to entertain the Tunisian envoy, come to Washington to negotiate on behalf of the Barbary pirates, and granted the Arab’s request for concubines for his eleven-strong party, he put down the cost as ‘appropriations for foreign intercourse’ (Jefferson was not amused).”

No word on whether Madison imported the concubines from Georgia.