Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Media Goes To The Wells To Make Up A Story

Our friends in the media get routinely beaten up about errant reporting. BBC News has found a way to publish complete crap and conjecture without worrying about appearing on a NARN segment of "This Week In Gatekeeping." One of the great things about this hypothesis is none of us will ever be around by the time it is conclusively proven wrong (kind of like global warming):

Humanity may split into two sub-species in 100,000 years' time as predicted by HG Wells, an expert has said. Evolutionary theorist Oliver Curry of the London School of Economics expects a genetic upper class and a dim-witted underclass to emerge. The descendants of the genetic upper class would be tall, slim, healthy, attractive, intelligent, and creative and a far cry from the "underclass" humans who would have evolved into dim-witted, ugly, squat goblin-like creatures.

I wonder what the beautiful people will look like?

. . . men will exhibit symmetrical facial features, look athletic, and have squarer jaws, deeper voices and bigger penises.

Sweet. You know what they say about those deep voiced guys. Meanwhile, women will look like this:

Women, on the other hand, will develop lighter, smooth, hairless skin, large clear eyes, pert breasts, glossy hair, and even features, he adds. Racial differences will be ironed out by interbreeding, producing a uniform race of coffee-coloured people.

OK, it probably isn't fair to suggest that liberals will evolve into ugly trolls while conservatives will be sexy. After all, Jessica Alba has been around Hollywood for long enough to become a tree-hugging bleeding heart. So in the interest of "fairness," here's a local conservative who makes the morlocks look good:

3 Comments:

Anonymous borat-fan said...

these liberal "scientific" have gone mad.
peter finger is professor at princeton university!!!

5:33 PM  
Anonymous Kristin said...

hey, some of the biggest idiots teach at great schools.

http://movies.crooksandliars.com/Countdown-King-George.wmv

watch that and listen to the prof from GWU.

I don't understand why social Darwinism is frowned upon.

10:20 AM  
Anonymous AAA said...

Its just an honor to have my picture posted along with Ham and Alba. Al link would of curse, be out of teh question.

1:15 PM  

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