Saturday, May 12, 2007

Top 11 Real Reasons the Star Tribune Cancelled Lileks’ Column And Reassigned Him to Cover Local Stories

11. Afraid that if they canned Nick Coleman there would be riots in France

10. It finally dawned on the editors that they never see Lileks at events

9. They were going to reassign Patrick Reusse instead, but were worried that he’d get mad and sit on them

8. Found out that Lileks appears on a radio show every Thursday with a guy who regularly urges people to cancel their Star Tribune subscription

7. Concerned that he wasn’t spending enough time with Gnat

6. Now that McClatchy has sold the paper, they are no longer under any pressure to run a token good writer

5. Anyone who can write 500 words on the design pattern of his paper towels without falling asleep at his typewriter has all the skills necessary for covering Soil and Water Conservation meetings

4. Never understood what this internet thing he kept talking about was

3. Editors tired of constantly reassuring Jim Boyd that James Lileks was really the pen name for liberal Hollywood actor Bob Balaban

2. Can hire eight humorists in India for the price of one Lileks

1. Realized that they could cancel him and yet continue reading him for free on the internet


Anonymous Anonymous said...

They should have canned Coleman AND Kersten. They are both the worst kind of hacks and the loss of both lunatic fringe columnists would have balanced each other out.

Judging by what he puts out, Coleman is the laziest writer I've ever seen. He picks a controversy, ignores facts, annoints a downtrodden hero, and blames a convenient villain. Other than changing the names, all his columns are identical.

Kersten either paraphrases the latest Republican press release or occasionally goes berserk about anything Muslim.

I think the real reason those 2 weren't reassigned to covering news is that neither one of them is qualified to do so.

11:01 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Can someone please admit it? The Quirk wasn't all that good!

2:58 PM  
Blogger DiscordianStooge said...

The Quirk was nice, but not good enough to keep. Backfence, which they dropped in favor of the Quirk, was a column I tried not to miss. The amount of space given to Quirk would have better in 2 weekly columns.

9:32 PM  

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