Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Top 11 Reasons Texas Governor Rick Perry Shot A Coyote While Jogging

11. Was firing at some undocumented aliens and missed

10. Typical way for a Texan to start his day

9. Was late for a meeting so he didn't have time to wrassle it down and kill it with his bare hands like he usually does

8. Couldn't find any RINOs to shoot

7. Celebrating the Detroit Red Wings' Game 7 victory over the Phoenix Coyotes in the NHL playoffs

6. Wanted to prove he's more of a badass than Arizona Governor Jan Brewer

5. Didn't want the situation to escalate into a Jimmy Carter/Killer Swamp Rabbit incident

4. Hopped up on rage from attending a TEA Party and had to kill something

3. Feds have failed to protect Texas from coyotes, so he had to take state action

2. All part of his hilarious Dick Cheney impersonation

1. The coyote drew a cartoon that offended Perry

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